Homo For the Holidays

Well we’re coming up to the holidays and I’ll be spending this Thanksgiving with my extended family.  I’m not a big one on spending time with the extended family because our lives are extremely different.  I live in the Columbus (Ohio) and I have a white-collar job while most if not all of my relatives live up in the area I was born and our focus on life is different to say the least.  It makes it difficult, going back as a 40-year-old gay man, to spend time with people who I don’t have much in common.  Most of the time I hang out with the ‘lady folk’ because that’s the best I can do in terms of relating to someone.  Even then it’s a little dicey.

So what’s a (gay) guy to do?  That’s a great question because I haven’t really figured it out.  Normally I go visit my friends in San Francisco and spend the Thanksgiving holiday with them.  While there I feel like I have an extended family in which I can relate to everyone.  We have a big meal, grace is said, and people sit around talking just like a “normal” family Thanksgiving.  I think that’s one of the things that makes this year different.  I’m so used to being with that group of people in San Francisco that it makes it more difficult to spend time with my biological family.

So what is it that makes these two environments so different?  I can think of one major contributor that makes up these different environments.  That one thing would be our work/life environments.  You see my family lives in a rural area of central Ohio.  Most of my family lives within twenty miles from where they were raised as children.   I often wonder what keeps them so connected to that area or more interesting is why don’t I feel that same connection.

I know some people in the LGBT community gather together creating their own family to celebrate Thanksgiving or Christmas.  I’ve done it myself but I do have to admit that I long for the same connection with my family.  The thing one has to remember is that you can’t change people.  By that I mean you can’t change your family.  So that leaves people like me and many others in the position of longing for something we can’t have in our lives.  All we can do is be positive and form those healthy relationships so that we have a family like structure to support us in our daily lives.

So chin up and forward facing we march to our drum.  Forming our own families to support us in our daily lives.  Build those healthy support structures for emotional and physical help every day.  Those relationships will carry us forward and into the future.  Everyone needs to keep this in mind.  If you ever feel alone simply look around.  There’s someone just like each of us and whether they admit it or not they are looking to build their own family.

Happy Holidays and build your ‘family’ strong!

I love a good brunch on Sunday!

So I started thinking about this Saturday night before I went to bed.  Now you know it’s bad when you start thinking about breakfast the night before.  I even started pulling up some menus to see what I thought might be the best place to go.  Of course breakfast is a comfort food for a lot of people so Sunday Brunch is awesome.

So we were going to meet at a restaurant called Northstar Cafe in Columbus. They have great food and I’ve always enjoyed my meal there.  The food is original and it’s good for you.  Well I obviously wasn’t the only person who was thinking that Northstar would be good.  When I arrived the line was back to the door.  So it would have taken us about 20 minutes just to order.

Of course if you know me, you know that I’m not going to wait for 20 minutes in a line.  So I called my friend who I was meeting for brunch and we made alternate plans.  It was shaky but we went to Abuelo’s to see if they were busy. 

Now Abuelo’s doesn’t serve breakfast but at this point we (really we’re talking about me) wanted some food.  I have to say I was very pleased with my meal.  Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve always enjoyed my meals there but this time I asked for suggestions and the waitress suggested their Pescado Guerrero.  I thought, what the heck, it’s seafood which isn’t something I would have thought of getting at a Mexican restaurant. Let me tell you it was delicious!  I liked the vegetables, the sauce, and the Mahi Mahi.  It was a wonderful dish and I completely enjoyed my ‘brunch’ there at Abuelo’s.

The other thing that I completely enjoyed was sitting and talking to my friend Ben.  We just sat there and chatted for a long time.  It was really nice to just reconnect with a good friend and not worry about what I needed to get done. It was also nice because I was stuffed and it gave me some extra time to let some of the food digest.

If you get a chance stop by Abuelo’s and try their food.  It’s not your common Mexican restaurant.  I think of it as being a step above and I’ve never had a bad meal.